pulling the plug; a reformat worth reformatting to

Some amazingly innovative words over here:

The cult classic Aoki Reviews

Based in El Aye now

"The weak become heroes then the stars align
We all sing we all sing all sing" - Michael Geoffery Skinner


sorry we haven't blogged for a while friends. have been driving across America in a u-haul truck. left our homes and families in small town Minnesota 2 weeks ago. finally unpacked and got internet for our condo in down town LA yesterday. getting this blog runnin' again LA style!1



Have already got a couple of pitches for TV shows ready. got a few numbers for some agents that will hopefully fit our style that can represent us in the appropriate manner.
But first things first, our iCal dump for tomorrow.


9-10am: get matching tattoo's from la ink - west hollywood

10- 10:15am: iced frappa from starbucks and check emails on free wi-fi

10:15 - 11am: google maps which one of these agents is closest:
Angel City Talent
1680 Vine St #716
Los Angeles, Ca 90028 ,

or

The Artists Group, Ltd.
10100 Santa Monica Blvd #2490
Los Angeles, Ca 90067,

11am-12pm: travel to the closest of the two

12pm-12:30pm: grab some bagels have a walking lunch whilst finding a printing shop to produce cheap business cards (see design to be provided to printers):


12:30-12:45: free time/buffer if printing takes longer than expected

12:45 - 1:30pm: conduct unscheduled meeting with new potential agent.
Agenda:
-Pitch ideas for 2 tv shows
-show portfolio of highlight StS posts
-negotiate representation fees
-settle on 20%
-sign contract

1:30pm-1:45pm: arrange follow up meeting

1:45pm-2:30pm: bus to venice beach, rent rollerblades, store macbooks and suits in locker.

2:30pm-4:30pm: blade the boardwalk. work on sweet LA tan

4:30pm-5pm: free time (get a snack or have a toilet break if needed)

5pm-6pm: travel back to condo, check emails

6pm-2am: blog about todays activities.



Based in LA now friends.

-KidWisdom

All time top 5* stage lawyers

*in chronological order


- Carl Lazlo, Esquire (career prime 1980)



- Vincent Gambini a.k.a "Vinny" (career prime 1992)



- Jackie Chiles (career prime 1996)



- Thomas Mesereau (actor with white hair) (career prime 2005)



- Barry Zuckerkorn (career prime 2005)


-KidWidsom

Euro cool

I really wish i wasn't indie right now. want to be a european. preferably eastern block. i want to be on eurovision next year. i'm getting good with the midi keyboard. figured out how to use garage band, reason 4.0 (full version), and ableton live (demo version). Can play the introduction to Toto's Africa, Daft Punk's Robot Rock, and Underworld's Born Slippery. i have also created a few originals (see previous post "Personal Branding; formaldehyde excursions - Book 1").

Spain (2008)

Trying to design a costume that appeals to europe as a whole.

Loving Serbia's 2009 contribution right now. thinking of going with a jheri-curled version of the accordion players hair-do for my Eurovision 2010 appearance.

Thinking of having 3 backing singers (2 girls, 1 guy). Want to have no more than 4 dancers. may train the backing singers to dance to reduce head count.

Will upload videos of good historical eurovision performances when i get time.


Live update: Hungary is awesome!!1!1!!!. will buy their album if on itunes music store.


-KidWisdom

Movers and Shakers

The golf course is no longer the place to make deals and be as bigger biggot as possible...Ok, maybe we can still be biggots and play golf, but deals sure aren't happening there any more.

So it seems only one half of the StS crew is being a corporate fatcat these days, another has been a victim of the GFC.  Whilst playing midweek golf with all of my new found time I got the inevitable question on the third hole from the others in my group, "so what do you do for a job that lets you play golf on a Tuesday".  This of course was an awkward moment, do I say what I used to do and just hope they don't dig, or do I just say I got made redundant and endure the awkwardness.  I went for option B and as much as I enjoy a good  awkward moment I was quite dumbstruck as to why this message was greeted with laughter.  I enquired what was so funny and was told that my two new golfing buddies were similarly placed finance workers without a job.  

I really think we were all there for the cheap sandwiches they sell in the clubhouse, however I did realise that maybe we are moving into an era where a new status symbol will be the amount of spare time one has on his hands.  Maybe a fast car will impress, but the fact that you can sit back and play golf on a Tuesday might also go a long way.

Religion world expo

Bukkake Fashions mum was driving us to get ice-cream two days ago. I was in the back seat and noticed a large old looking building with big points and one of those elongated "+" symbols as seen on the front cover of the Justice album. I said "hay lady, whats that building?". Bukkake's mum replied "oh, that's a church". "What do they sell in there?" Bukkake asked. In a calm soothing voice she replied, "Darling, they don't sell anything. They do religion".

After we got our ice-cream we went back to Bukkake's house and did some research to find out about religions. Bukkake's mum let us use her computer whilst she cleaned up the melted ice-cream we dripped on her car seats.


Catholic:
Covers a lot of other sub religions like baptist, anglican, scientology, 7th day eventist, jahovas witness, christian, and morman.
Pro's:
- have cable tv stations dedicated to them
- good land ownership
- good political influence in the western world
- will recognize a lot of people when you go to the horse racing
- can steal gold, money, and land from other religions whilst countries are at war
Con's:
- high chance of getting molested
- likely to surrender your self-brand to become a generic WASP
- having to justify and explain why you have chosen a sub-class of Catholic (baptist, anglican...)




Jew:
Fairly high profile religion, and have their own country.
Pro's:
- wear cool hats
- good for business and business development
- reduced chance of catching the swine flu
Cons:
- get your money stolen by the Catholic's
- being ridiculed by the anti-semite religion


DIY start-up religion:
Pro's:
- can become instantly powerful as a leader
- good for an eccentric self-brand
- engaging in normally risky activities can be passed of as being "an integral part of the religion"
Con's:
- hard to start up
- decipals are likely to be made up exclusively by a small group of misfits
- being confused as a cult rather than religion as misfit decipals promote your idea's and teaching the wrong way (this point forced me to shut down my start-up religion)


Muslim
High profile religion, get a lot of bad publicity.
Pro's:
- any publicity is good publicity
- get to wear cool fabrics
- diverse corporate organizations give you a prayer room
- famous boxers belong to this religion
- if you are good at Muslim you can call yourself a Mufti
Con's:
- miss-understood by non-muslims
- catholics confuse as terrorists
- need to wait in long queues when you go to Mecca




Budist:
One of those miscellaneous religions derived from asian countries
Pro's:
- healthy lifestyle
- good at yoga
- cost effective religion in recession
- rad cloth clothing
- possibility of getting a free trip to disneyland
- friendly and well liked my most other brands of religion
Cons:
- shaved heads
- food not so good
- often overlooked as a major religion
- little political influence



Gay
Highly creative religion founded by the romans or greeks
Pros:
- fun lifestyle
- get to go in rad parade once a year
- high disposable income
- make good movies
Con's:
- hard to breed
- ridiculed by the Catholics




Hindu:
Large religion, popular in India and surrounding countries
Pro's:
- kind of trendy at the moment
- colorful vibe to it
- large selection of gods
Con's:
- they have restrictions on food
- often overlooked as a serious religion


Let us pray

-KidWisdom

Shootin' dice

"I'm trapped again
Come and rescue me" - Bruce Springsteen

I saw a guild of indies playing Mousetrap in a park on a sunny day a few months back. Today in the office I see some corporates playing connect four during their lunchbreak.

We do enjoy a good board game, and with 'bring-from-home-lunches' on the rise, I think we are going to see a massive increase in corporate boardgame playing.


My mousetrap construction skills make Michael Scofield, from the popular TV action-drama Prison Break, look like a 4-year-old struggling with safety scissors.
I can rig-up a Moustrap game that has missing or broken pieces with nothing more than rubber bands, sticky-tape, and uncooked pasta, in less than 20min.

We had our crack-research team do some market and business case viability testing. They returned with this image:To us, this is clear evidence there is a growing opportunity for monopoly bankers. Two per game. You can get them cheap now that LEH (see prior post 'pick me, pick me...') and other major investment houses have run into "Trouble" (excuse the pun).


Our other favorite games are Backgammon and Cluedo.


-KidWisdom

Hitting the Mall; and making a first impression

"This is how we do it.
Its friday night, and I feel all right
The party is here on the west side" - Montell Jordan

To our surprise there has been no slow down to the adoption of over indie-cised fixed gear riding.

So here are some cool ideas of documents/objects to weave into the rear wheel spokes of your fixed gear bicycle.
We think this will buy another 2-3 months for the craze:
-business cards from now redundant clients of formerly high profile investment banks
-drink coaster of an ironic beer brand
-business cards from members of your scooter gang (see prior post for reference)
-laminated flattened packet of Kool cigarettes
-entire Tempest set of MTG cards
-laminated minor police infringements (e.g. riding with no helmet, jay-walking)
-a Warhol postcard
-laminated favorite StS blog post
-Highway 61 Revisited album art
-laminated $400+ receipt from American Apparel
-Early 90's football or basketball collector card
-'Go Vegan' bumper sticker with backing still on
-generic family photo that comes in a purchased photo frame


To solve the conundrum of how far to roll the left leg of your skinny jean up, we suggest switching to elastic waisted and cuffed denim pant. Hard to come by yes, but the comfort and convenience will make the hunt worth while. An ironed in hard crease will complete the look.

-Cycling Consultant

Dear General Public,

So I sent this out to the major brokers at the Guggenheim a couple of weeks back. As yet no response. We are assuming the Gugg board are putting together a fairly lucrative deal and proposal in order to secure this premier showing.

(please click on the image below for a copy of the original letter)Going mainstream friends.

-KidWisdom

here ye, hear ye; a must have item

this is a piece of equipment that does not get the consideration most of our other must have accessories do. We all agree a Nikon camera looks tres cool hanging around ones neck in front of a plain white v-neck t-shirt. but a megaphone around the neck, or off ones shoulder, or around the waist is where the pigs go to eat, sleep, and shit.

Helping people is what what we do here at StS, so we have done extensive research and prepared some photo's to help muse, and keep you all eating & sleeping with the best of us.



Here is one I would suggest for the ladies. Cool color, and the snappy little strap could be replaced with a thin white leather one



Red and white gives a clean classic look. This will go as well resting on the bar, as it will pointed at the ceiling in the middle of the dance floor.



If your partying with pals, this is a great option. you can pass the microphone bit around whist still maintaining power by holding the actual speaker bit


This one kind of reminds me of those shoes from that popular movie 'back to the future'


This one is ultra authentic. It really portrays the high school sports carnival. I can see these ones becoming a big deal in the smoking area


This is Jimmy 'Mouth of the South' Heart, and is a good example of being too flamboyant with the megaphone. less is more

This is just a little heads up of things to come. This look can definitely be pulled off really well, but like anything cool, it has the risk of being overdone.

get in quick friends.

-KidWisdom

Doo doo doobie doo; good thing

I want to become the leader of a scooter gang. I'll earn a living shootin' dice and hustling at the local pool hall. We'll ride everywhere in packs, become renowned and praised as icons of the inner city street. Local law enforcement will know each of us by name.

Justice leather jackets, dior denim with chucks for cruise rides. Justice leather jackets, jack london leather leg wear with chucks for speed rides.


I tried riding fixies but I need something motorized. FYC represent this movement:



-KidWisdom

Connecticut Cool

This may amaze you all, however we aren't the only bleeding edge blog getting about these days, it seems there is competition. In an effort to stay at the front we have chosen to rip-off the fashion tips from the roy clothing blog (ripping off stuff from other blogs is the new cool).

Johnny footbal hero:

Favourite comeback?

From 10 down with 5 minutes remaining.

Why do you think you have been chosen to rep Suffice to Say?

God gave me a chiselled jawline for a reason.

How do you like your fashion?

Connecticut cool.

What fashion item can't you live without?

Anything from vineyard vines.

- Bukkake Fashions

making the world a better place; our proudest moment

Some months ago Suffice to Say decided to dedicate some of our resources to the world of philanthropy.

We can give corporations around the world a helping hand. Our creative skills combined, we sent a cold letter to a major southern-hemisphere retail chain to assist in leveling-up their advertising footprint.

The latest catalog has gone to print, and our advice (below) is more than visable throughout the color pages.

(click the image below for a copy of the original letter)




-KidWisdom

muse me; full house

"Everywhere you look, and everywhere you look" - Jesse Frederick & John Stamos

Sometimes, in rare instances, it just doesn't fell right to blink. In these seemingly brief moments we see writing, characters, acting, music, set design, lighting, backstory, direction, and fashion become indistinguishable from one another. If we clear our heads just enough, and attempt to analyze one aspect, I think we can once again be happy as a people.

So here is a fashion show I made from the one of the greatest forms of media ever presented to the general public.Some of the highlights from season 1988-89

Sweaters, need not be dull.

This is how to do leather detailing.


Pastels are cool, but don't ignore your solids.



Turtlenecks. In the office on Friday's perhaps.




Don't sell your dreams so soon friends.

-KidWisdom

The standing ovation; rebirth of the private practice law firm

"I know that I must do whats right -
Sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti" - David Paich & Jeff Porcaro

Gone are the investment bankers, born are the lawmakers.


So I'm watching Obama addressing congress. He is receiving standing ovations on every 3rd point he makes. A partial standing ovation is made for the first 2 points in every 3 point cycle.
The panning camera sweeps of the room seem to encourage the participation of the audience. I desperately want a standing ovation. maybe you can stand up and applaud after reading this blog post.

I want to become a lawmaker. I want to begin by founding a private law firm. All cases will be settled before they reach court. I have no official legal license to practice. Efficiency is key my friends. Trim the fat. I don't need no god damn judge to tell me right from wrong. I will be the one to make these decisions. KidWisdom and Associates will only take on cases that are morally right. I will help solve real American problems. The flag will be embossed on all my stationary and correspondence leaving my offices. The American flag is not copyrighted. No royalties will be paid. I will wear a judges wig for all client facing meetings. I will have the best and biggest law firm in America. My staff will be more ethnically diverse than any HR department could wish for in a 4 hour brainstorming session. Even if i was wearing a ski-mask and carrying a felt bag with a big dollar sign on it could i not be more professional.


This is America friends


-KidWisdom

the perpetual motion machine; tour de indie

"Everything You Always Wanted to Know About [Fixies]* (*But Were Afraid to Ask)" - Woody Allen




fixies are the most hektik thing ever invented.

I'm going to build me one. Flat white frame, white tyres, light red handle bars and highlights. My bus pass has become too expensive. i figure if i ride to work one day a week. i can recover the cost of a $1k bike in 200 weeks or 3.85 years. but think of the fun i will have!
I will also grow legs like Bukkake Fashions circa 2004.

here is KidWisdom learning/practicing. Bukkake Fashions is on the unicycle (he makes his first appearance 50sec into this 5min ordeal):


this is the guy who is helping me build it:


yellow wristbands for all.

-KidWisdom

performance art; the pre-organized group dance

Orchestrated indie group dancing at semi-mainstream nightclubs has been a dream of mine since both Bukkake Fashions and KidWisdom clocked 'white-man-dancing' on expert some months ago. Often whilst sipping on my own recipe cocktail and watching the self-obsessed mess unfold at a favorite purposefully designed dive club/bar, i pray that 4-5 indies will clear a decent section of the dance floor and break into orchestrated, perfectly in sync, dance moves reminiscent of late 80's/early 90's groups such as 'New Kids on the Block' and to a lesser degree 'East-17'.

The exact mind image of what routine I am praying for can be seen in this clip:
New kids on the block - you've got (the right stuff) - 1988




I have reached the point where I am so desperate to see this I feel I will have to take matters into my own hands. So, I am after 4-5 indies. I'm not concerned about gender, however any fems interested need to be aware that they will be playing masculine roles (I don't have a Janet Jackson style dance in mind, so i make no apologies about this). I will also make it known that i did get this idea after watching a Fat Boy Slim hour on a cable music television station. 'Praise You' is a truly magical music video made by one of your indie-idols Spike Jonze, not to be mistaken for Spike Lee.
These guys used a crew of 7, I have plans for 4 and obviously 1 understudy. But trying to get 2 indies working together will be harder than breeding pandas, so getting 4 to work together will need the implementation of some world class management techniques.

We will also need to get a DJ on board. this shouldn't be too hard. everybody seems to know a DJ these days. However, apparently at mainstream clubs/bars you can request songs, this may be the better option.


-KidWisdom

Speak godamit, speak!

So I recently found out you can get your MacBook to talk to you when you highlight text.

I set it up so when you press 'Option' and 's' (referred to as "Option-S" from now on), it will read whatever you have highlighted. Most people pigeon-hole me as a very slow reader. The only form of books I have ever 'read' were in the form of audio books, or people reading them out loud to me. I read bits and pieces of newspaper articles and form opinions based on the 'jist' of whatever limited parts I have read. It has worked remarkably well for me up to this point. "Option-S" I feel has opened up a new chapter in my life.

I used "Option-S" on David Cross' article. I did laugh-out-loud at parts of it, made even more humorous by the style of voice reading it to me, which is reminiscent of that guy in the wheelchair (god bless him, you know the one).

For me, "Option-S" works rather well. I now have 20 years of New-Yorker articles to catch up on. Will report back with leveled-up infinite wisdom in coming days.


Read-a-thon friends.

-KidWisdom

Sporting the Jheri Curl

So we're all massive fans of the standard jib indie haircut, but i think you will all want to diversify in the coming autumn months. I feel the dedicated indies will attempt to rock the Jheri Curl in an effort to level themselves up from the mainstream indie home-job haircuts.



The Jheri curl requires time, money, and professionals. Your Valiumed up lifepartner/housemate/girlfriend/child/boyfriend/wife/business-partner simply will not have the skills to help you out on this style. So unfortunately the Jheri curl quest will require a visit to your twitched out pro hairdresser/hairstylist (I don't know which one they like to be called).

I have been intrigued by the Jheri curl for about eight and a half years now. And always wondered how it is done. So I did a fair bit of research and this is the jist of it (summary from Wiki-P):

1. hit some product called 'softener'
2. once the hair is loose, wind it up on some perm-rods (damn good word, will probably be the name of my first born)
3. set the permed hair with some other type of chemical to make the perm permanent.
4. moisturize the hair like it is your dried-out dehydrated child
5. sleep with a plastic shower cap on

Found this documentary after i did the above research (good confirmation of what I found on Wiki-P):


Kapow!

-KidWisdom
-Bukkake Fashions (Editor)

Condo livin'

"Hundred dollar car note, two hundred rent. I get a check on Friday, but it's all ready spent." - Huey Lewis

StS hit the highways in search of more than just sunrises, cocktail bars, and open air cinemas this vacation.


What we found was the Dior, Louis Vuitton, and Chanel laden corridors at the Marina replaced with $10 tee-shirt & $15 sunglasses shops. Sadly they have run out of fluro Sheraton Mirage visors, the only thing we wanted to purchase from here.



The last Ansett flight took everything with it. Thankfully they left these classic Christmas decorations, these will be on display till March.



And by the pool, a steady stream of Japanese tourists (who have not realised Australian excess is no longer in vogue), continued to pump just enough cash into this place to keep it running.



The classic logo stands.



We are taking logical steps into advertising...

-KidWisdom & Bukkake Fashions

Two cats one thimble

So I stumbled across this treasure on my daily business media farming quest.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7838940.stm

But they are both copying Slimane, no?

Anyway, a glorious slap fest ensues:



-KidWisdom

The Ponzi Scheme; when a facey status update just won't do

Buffet once said, “Only when the tide goes out do you discover who's been swimming naked”.

As a follow up from the much talked about "World Championships of Prison Rules American Handball" the StS office is offering more ideas for the mainstream.


Hot summer days. Quiet offices. Festival filled weekends. The corporate world has gone hectic for the lunchtime suited tops off.

Leave the jackets on the coat hanger. Hit a center city grassed area with your work crew. Set aside some time for a coconut oil slik-up. All get your iPhones out and simultaneously press play on the recently downloaded avb podcast. Laybacks, windmills, and wide stanced archery shots. Watch the one-track zoids pull you up on the podium.

Afta party back at the office.
StS is rokin da hill @ 12noon.


I was having trouble finding an appropriate image that represents what's going on here, so I had to mind sketch that onto a joint post-it note during lunchtime. Corporate cut backs forced me to trade my set of 60 Derwent watercolor pencils for a weekly bus ticket. I used a pacer pencil instead.

-KidWisdom

Crisitunity Ver 2.0

So it seems the crisis has hit the UK office especially hard as can be evidenced in this article.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/7834731.stm




To summarise, staff can take up to 3 months off at 30% pay or start working 4 day weeks at reduced pay. To me this seems like some pretty creative thinking, people get a well earned break and they avoid having to put people off and the bad press associated with it. Personally I hope that they bring this policy in at our office. I have already planned out what I will do.
- Work shitty coffee shop job 2-3 days a week. 1-2 Months
- Fly to Maldives. 1-2 Months
- Possibly either mooch at one of dads hotels and live in one of the hotel villas or work on the hotel boat 1-2 days a week so that I feel useful
- Work on my tan



Speaking of boats, the StS crew ventured out on the weekend for a boat cruise, we pretty much wanted an excuse to dress with an nautical theme without any unsavoury connotations. Due to the star studded lineup other bloggers also attended this tickle fest where there was near mutiny at the mention of StS not being the superior blog in attendance.

- Bukkake Fashions